After the storm comes the calm, this is the case of Mattie Jackson, who lost her husband after a great fall, found love again years later, and shares her story to comfort others.
Alan Jackson, a famous singer and songwriter whose country-pop sound has endeared him to the heart of many, is a lot of things, including a family man.
His eldest daughter, Mattie Jackson, a certified sommelier who once owned a wine bar in Nashville, married Ben Selecman in a fairytale wedding in Nashville.
Alan Jackson on June 24, 2017 in Manhattan, Kansas | Source: Getty Images
After a year of dating, Selecman proposed to Jackson, and they eventually got married in 2017. Jackson celebrates family and posted photos of everything that means a lot to her on Thanksgiving.
Mattie posted pictures of her sister Ali Jackson who tied the knot with her husband Sam Bradshaw amidst festivities and warmth.
TRAGEDY STRUCK
The graduate of the University of Tennessee did not have any foreboding of evil on the beautiful Labor day in September in Florida, surrounded by family. While celebrating on Jackson's father's ship on a sunny day, Selecman tried to help the ladies up the dock when the unimaginable happened.
The dock was wet, and Selecman slipped and fell hard. This, at first, did not seem like anything serious, but on the advice of the off-duty EMTs, they took him to the hospital.
Barely a year after getting married, Jackson was thrown into a quandary when the neurosurgeons said that Selecman had swelling in the brain and would have to undergo surgery.
Selecman was medically induced into an 11-day coma to relieve him of the pain. Surgeries were performed, and it was agreed upon to wake Selecman up gradually.
Plans were underway to perform physical therapy and trauma classes for the injured Selecman when the coast became apparent, and things were normalized.
Little did the bride know that the worst was just about to happen. After plans were made to wake Selecman up and hope ignited, he suffered multiple strokes and severe brain damage. According to Mattie, the downward spiral of her husband's health was so fast. She revealed that:
"…it was less than 24 hours before his heart started to fail."
In less than 24 hours, Selecman's heart started to fail, and everything was going downhill so fast. The assistant district attorney of Nashville died at 28 years old, three weeks before his first wedding anniversary. Mattie reminisced about the period when she lost her husband. She said, "We were still in the honeymoon phase of our life."
Mattie believes that all that happened is for a reason, although it may not seem fair. She said the time they had together would always remain special to her. She is of the opinion that:
"...he is perfect for eternity now, just not the way that we wanted."
Mattie and Selecman had precious moments together, and she recently posted some throwbacks of them in a park. Mattie posted a picture of herself and her late husband, in which she called him her little "reindeer" during her favorite season of the year -Christmas time, and her partnership with a window's club.
On their third wedding anniversary, Jackson paid tribute to her love and posted lovely pictures of them looking so in love, saying she will choose him over again no matter the result.
On his 30th posthumous birthday, Jackson celebrated a life full of love and adventure and how he had the ultimate experience - being with Jesus with photos.
Three years after the tragic loss of her husband, Jackson picks up the broken pieces of her life on trudging on, and she meets her new muse. She described this man via an Instagram post as her "best friend's brother-in-law."
Mattie revealed that she would like to keep her relationship out of public view in light of her husband's tragic loss, which happened earlier.
Mattie has made a bold and courageous move to show the man of her life because not everyone will welcome this new phase. She describes him in her own words:
"This man is more of an answer to prayer… than I sometimes think he even realizes."
Mattie has decided to love again despite the pain and loss of her previous relationship and is unapologetic about it. She can be seen together with her man having fun at beautiful locations.
SHARING HER PAIN AND HURT
Losing a loved one can be tragic and tortuous and after that is resignation to fate. After losing her husband and finding strength again to love, Jackson decides to share her pain and loss with the world, helping people in such situations find hope and strength to move on.
Publishing her book "Lemons on Friday" was a step to sharing her experiences about her loss and grief and is dedicated to everyone trying to cope after losing a dear one.
Mattie, who had always loved to write and found it an easy outlet to share and let go of her pain, did not restrain from this when she lost her husband.
In an interview, she revealed that writing and praying helped her through the grieving process. She said she never intended to write a book, but after writing a journal in that period of her life, it is okay to write a book that concerns all she went through.
Mattie said she went through the phase of wanting answers about why this tragedy was her lot. She needed to know who was to blame, and if things were done differently, the outcome would have been the same.
Jackson said she beat herself too hard and regretted that she did not stay still, and she would not have needed a widow if she was still. The young bride wrote her book amidst her pain and suffering and holds on to her faith and what the bible says about life after death.
She trusts God and believes Selecman is in a happy place devoid of pain and suffering. She confessed that she found it hard to talk to family and friends about her pain and understands what it is to go through a harrowing experience without having one with whom you can speak.
She believes that her pain would be worth it if her shared experiences via her book could reach out to those in that dark place Talking about her pain and how she felt that such tragedy would happen to her, she explains that God is a good God in all circumstances.
She says that the world is sinful and evil things happen every day, but that does not mean that God chose to hurt us. She believes that her book will shed light on how you can believe God and be hurt and still not get consumed by your pain.
Mattie reminisced about her late husband's lifestyle. She said he loved going fishing with her dad and won the heart of her family. She said she felt neither kind of pain when her family was amiss about how to confirm and support her during this period of pain.
Selecman came into the Jackson family and became their beloved. Leaving them so soon was as tragic as any sad story. When asked how she copes, she explained that she took a break and paused. Selecman's death taught her to understand when it's right to move forward and when to stop and take a break.
Mattie advised those in pain of losing a loved one that she has learned to hold on to the last chapter of her life. She agreed that although there are times when she is confused about what the future holds and what step to take from here. She succinctly said:
"Every chapter is different but no chapter is bad."
Mattie is genuinely acting out what she preaches as she is seen in one of her latest posts looking all radiant and beautiful with a caption that suggests she is getting her life back together.
Talking about her book, Jackson said it was her solo project and is a personal story. She recalls that her parents could only look on when their daughter was going through the pain of the loss of her husband.
Fame or fortune could not stem the hurt and pain Jackson felt. Her book was essential to her as her late husband was. In letting the world in on her pain and sorrow, Alan Jackson and his wife are proud parents and give all the support they can to help her achieve her dreams.
Mattie and her proud parents can be seen on various occasions together as one big family. After going through so much, Mattie deserves as much love and happiness as possible. We truly wish her so much goodness in the years to come!
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Delta Gatti
Update: 2024-07-04